Ebola spread across the Atlantic.
Korea hacked Sony for making a moving about killing their despot.
My love life.
This is a fantasy baseball guide dang it, so let's bring into focus not the nights of tears on my couch with a bottle of ripple watching Hallmark Channel movies, but those men that stunk it up like a rancid piece of flesh left out in the backyard refrigerator for a week after the motor went out. For the most part, we will avoid talking about players that went down with catastrophic injury, but don't think I won't hit on a bunch of injury-plagued bums in this sucker regardless.
C - Joe Mauer, Wilin Rosario
A move to first, while still qualifying at catcher, was supposed to help Mauer regain his elite status. Not so much. Mauer hit .277, a career worst (career .319), with four homers and 55 RBIs. Those numbers don't even play as a second catcher in mixed leagues. Just 31 on Opening Day 2015, there's likely a significant batting average rebound coming, but he's only 1B eligible now. I warned, repeatedly, about Rosario last preseason. My refrain was always “not enough fly balls and too dependent on sky-high HR/F.” What happened in 2014? His ground ball rate spiked to 50 percent (terrible), while his HR/F plummeted to a 4-year low of 13.3 percent. A rebound in both areas is likely coming in 2015, but this is not the profile of a 25-homer bat.
1B - Prince Fielder, Joey Votto, Eric Hosmer 
I feel fine bashing Fielder after he missed one game from 2009 to 2013. He missed 120 last year with a neck issue that was surgically repaired. If healthy, there's no reason to think that he couldn't replicate his 2013 numbers, though (.279-25-106). Votto's lower half is a big concern as the injuries continue to mount. Just a year removed from hitting .305 with 24 homers. So much of last season looks “normal” except for two key areas: Votto posted a 10.7 HR/F ratio (18.3) and .299 BABIP (career .355). Hosmer was a victim of expectations. He killed it late in the year and into the playoffs by reworking his hand position in the swing, but do you buy that small sample size? He owns a 52 percent ground ball rate for his career. If he keeps doing that, 20 homers is likely a pipe dream, though that 6.8 percent HR/F ratio was a joke (11.2 career).
2B - Jason Kipnis, Jedd Gyorko
Multiple health issues limited Kipnis to 129 games. He had a three-year low walk rate. His .288 BABIP was a 4-year low. His HR/F ratio was less than half his career rate (4.8 compared to 10.0). After averaging 80 RBIs and 86 runs in 2012-13, he produced 41 and 61. Drafted as an elite 2B, he performed likely a moderate middle infield option. Gyorko was being elevated to nearly elite status by some prior to the start of the season (not us). He was an unmitigated disaster who hit .210 with three steals and 10 homers. Gyorko saw his ground ball rate climb to 44 percent while his HR/F ratio dipped more than 50 percent to 9.5 percent and that spelled doom for his '14 output.
3B - David Wright, Pedro Alvarez, Mike Moustakas
Wright appeared in 134 games but hit eight homers with 54 runs, both career-lows. He hit .269, .029 points below his career mark. He stole eight bases, his first single digit effort since 2004 when he played just 69 games. He also failed to record 65 RBIs for the third time in four seasons. At 32 years of age, it's fair to wonder what he has left. Alvarez really can't field, so he will need to refine his game as he moves to first base in '15. Alvarez hit 66 homers with 185 RBIs in 2012-13 before falling to 18 and 56 last season as he appeared in just 122 contests. He simply needs 500+ at-bats or his counting numbers won't be high enough to offset a horrible .235 career batting average. I cannot understand why I have to write about Moustakas each year or why on earth anyone would be disappointed with him. Simply put—he is awful. Soak it in. Let it wash over you. Accept it, Mr. and Mrs. Living in Denial. For his career he has a .236/.290/.379 slash line. Folks, Luis Valbuena dusted that in 2014 (.249/.341/.435).
SS - Elvis Andrus, Jean Segura, Brad Miller
Andrus had scored 85 runs in four straight seasons from 2010 to 2013, making him the only shortstop in that club. He scored 72 times in 2014. He just didn't get on base enough with a .314 OBP, .021 points below his career mark. That also led to a few less thefts —27 after averaging 33 the previous five seasons. He also hit a career worst .263. Segura was stupendous in the first half of the 2013 season. Since then he's been brutally inefficient. He has no power—other than a two-week stretch in 2013—and he's hit .244 since August 1st, 2013. Dude drove in 31 runs last season and after swiping 44 bases in 2013, he stole 20 in 2014 (his OBP for 2014 was a sickly .289). Miller spun his wheels as if in a mud puddle. He struck out more, hit only .221 and was given just 367 at-bats because of his ineptitude. Still just 25 years old, Miller might still fulfill expectations, though he laid the proverbial egg in 2014.
OF - Ryan Braun, Bryce Harper, Alex Rios
Braun's thumb issue was way more severe than the Brewers let on all offseason (he had a procedure done this past offseason to hopefully correct what ails him). Braun couldn't drive the ball and the result was a career low 19 homers and a third straight season of declining SLG. He also lost patience at the dish with a six-year low in his walk rate and when he hit the ball, the BABIP gods were not on his side (career low .304, compared to .336 since 2007). Harper is 22 years old, an age when many still haven't taken their first big league at-bat. A second straight down effort, though, was the reward for those that spent an early round pick on Harper. Too many strikeouts were an issue, 104 in 352 at-bats and because of his bum wheel, he only stole two bases after averaging 15 his first two seasons. Rios hit .291 with an average of 22 homers, 86 RBIs, 88 runs scored and 33 steals in 2012-13. He went .280-4-54-54-17. He simply didn't drive the ball at all with a .398 SLG, the mark was .473 in 2012-13 and his 2.9 HR/F ratio was about a third of normal (8.8).
SP - Justin Verlander, Shelby Miller,
I tried to warn folks all year; few listened and Twitter battles ensued. The Oracle won yet again. Verlander had a 4.54 ERA and 1.40 WHIP and he saw his K rate plummet to 6.95 per nine (the mark has been 8.79 or higher the previous five seasons). He also saw his velocity go down for a 5th straight season, having lost more than three mph from his peak. He's done being elite. Miller kept his velocity but suffered a shocking loss of strikeouts from 8.78 per nine to 6.25. He also added more than half a batter to his walk rate leading to a horrible 1.74 K/BB ratio, more than one point below his rookie mark of 2.96. He had problems throwing strikes and locating his pitches. Salazar's stuff is filthy. He's one of the few who could throw a no-hitter every time out. Well, he can never last nine innings, so that's not true, but he can dominate with the best of them. Less than 60 percent with his first strike percentage and he made 20 starts but went six innings just seven times.
RP - Joe Nathan, Ernesto Frieri, Grant Balfour
Nathan lost a batter off his career K-rate, saw his walk rate explode to 4.50 after nine straight seasons under 3.10 and his swinging strike percentage was the second worst mark of his career. His stuff is no longer sharp and at 40 years of age, it's fair to wonder if a rebound is even possible. Frieri was a disaster in 2014 with a 7.34 ERA and 1.46 WHIP. Frieri always allows fly balls but somehow he - literally - doubled his career HR/9 mark (2.38 in '14 compared to 1.19 for his career). I could make a valid case that he didn't truly “earn” the ratios he posted, but no one who owned Frieri in 2014 would care one bit about my mental gymnastics. Balfour had a 5.12 combined ERA in 2012-13. The mark was 4.91 in 2014. He lost his closers job with the Rays, saw his K/9 rate (8.23) dip more than a batter and a half compared to his career mark, but holy lost location Batman. Balfour walked a sickening total of 5.92 batters per nine innings.